This research examines media accounts of teachers in Canada and the United States who were fired or forced from their Catholic schools because they identified as lesbian, highlighting the reality of discrimination in Catholic schools, particularly egregious in their contradiction of non-discrimination legislation. Caught between the religious edicts of the Vatican and the secular laws of the state, Catholic schools in Canada and the United States respond to non-heterosexual students and teachers in contradictory and inconsistent ways, including expulsion, firing, or more subtle forms of exclusion. This study suggests that the issue is not within a country's legal or policy protections but in the consistent prioritization of Catholic Canonical law through provision of religious exemptions over the rights of staff.