This book explains how many of the behaviors that adults use to "help" kids are, at best, ineffective and, at worst, destructive to the adults' relationships with children. Adults traditionally believe that external cues prompt correct behavior--the premise of stimulus-response psychology. However, the ideas discussed here revolve around the principle that people exhibit purposeful behavior and are internally motivated. Therefore, adults cannot force kids to be responsible and independent, but they can help children move in this direction. Adults can teach self-evaluation and how to assess life's direction. Parents, teachers, and counselors must learn how to use the techniques of informing, encouraging, and recognizing so as to put the "self" back in self-esteem and to encourage responsibility. Each chapter, amply illustrated with cartoon birds who portray adults and kids, focuses on a concept designed for empowering kids. The book introduces the problem and then offers a definition of what constitutes solutions. Subsequent chapters explore different strategies, such as creating involvement, exploring the perceptual system, accessing the quality world, learning self-evaluation, and choosing a new attitude. Suggestions for further reading appear at the end of the book. (RJM)