For those who have just been appointed to their first headship or who are aspiring to be a head of school, they undoubtedly know the importance of the mechanics of finance, curriculum, development, and trustee work. These are critical to their success. After four years of headship, however, the author has come to learn that the intangibles can be the most important aspects of the job--and the hardest to learn. This article presents some lessons the author has learned, not always the easy way.