Many of us from what are referred to as "dominant cultures" are reluctant to speak because of fear of offending those who are marginalized and perhaps making matters worse. Over the last several years, I have attended talks on various kinds of discrimination, especially when racialization is the main focus. As a White woman of privilege, I often have the experience of being the target of difficult accusations. In essence, I often feel myself being positioned as the problem. And these kinds of allegations are not easy to hear. In response, there are times when I find myself grappling silently while secretly yearning for conversations that could be more generative and insightful. By revisiting some of these experiences, I hope to deepen understandings of the kinds of responses that seem to prevent us from working in more relational ways. Further, I hope that by doing so, I might also understand some of the reactions and difficulties our White (majority) as well as our marginalized students tend to experience. (Contains 11 notes.)