Background: The aim of this research was to understand the characteristics that adults with intellectual disabilities look for in a partner. There have been numerous studies that have explored partner selection for people without intellectual disabilities, but no research that specifically identified the traits valued in a partner by people with intellectual disabilities. Method: In-depth interviews were conducted with eleven participants across two UK sites. All participants were adults with an intellectual disability who had been in a relationship with a partner for over a year. The narratives were analysed utilizing hermeneutic phenomenology, guided by the theory of Van Manen (1990). Results: The findings highlighted that, regardless of age, participant's relationships typically developed within a segregated environment for people with intellectual disabilities over the past 10 years. People with intellectual disabilities expressed a wish to be loved, to be treated kindly and to have companionship. However, they did not place high value on attributes such as financial security, social status or intelligence. Conclusions: The research demonstrated how poorly integrated people with intellectual disabilities are within mainstream society. Desired characteristics and expectations for participant's relationships were rooted in a shared history and culture, which was shaped by their intellectual disability and support needs.