This paper interrogates education's relationship to labor through a consideration of sex education's relationship to sexual labor. Beginning with a basic question--why does sex education exist as a federally funded project?--the author examines sex education's relationship to normativity and sexual labor throughout its history as a federally funded program. Doing so reveals at least three ways sex education has been and is connected to sexual labor: (1) by its relationship to prostitution and the stigmatization of sex workers, particularly non-white, female sex workers; (2) by promoting marriage, as itself a kind of sexual labor; and (3) by reducing sexuality to a commodity, thus producing sexual workers and consumers. At stake, then, is the possibility of taking seriously the significance of sexual labor to the stories told about sex education, the stories sex education tells about human value, and the possibility of imagining a future of sex education that promotes more nuanced conversations about the relationship between work, labor, sexuality, and education beyond the dehumanizing influence of neoliberalism.