Analysis has become especially challenging as researchers become more aware of their positions as subjective participants as well as analysts of their own research projects. Four female researchers involved in a study of gender and literacy analyzed their own disclosures from the recent past, and found the concepts of subjectivity, transaction, objectivity, and reflexivity to be key issues in their struggles to be honest with the data and with themselves. The researchers' desires to understand has directed each of them to the literature on research methodology, yet they continue in their struggles to apply theories of subjectivity that focus on the stories of others to their situation of analyzing their own personal texts. The researchers need to allow themselves a critical space in which to question the researchers they are in relation to the participants they once were (and perhaps still are). As they acknowledge this ambiguity and this space, they may be able to identify with themselves without losing the subjectivity they desire and claim. Still, they question whether a researcher committed to feminist methodology can balance the dual roles of researcher critically analyzing her own disclosures as a study participant. While it is important for them to view their analysis as involving a subject/subject focus, it is also necessary to understand the self/other relationship inherent in the researchers' work as both readers and writers. Even after their divergent and passionate discussions and stances about their own responsibilities and obligations in this project, the researchers are still left questioning whether they have fulfilled their moral obligation and ethical responsibility as to how they position themselves. (Contains 17 references.) (RS)