A fundamental issue in research on violence between couples who are dating or married is the question of when abuse begins in the relationship. A study was conducted to examine the relationship between gender, level of emotional commitment, and the use of conflict tactics in couples whose levels of emotional commitment ranged from "casual dating" to "married." College students (N=562) who reported being involved in a dating or married relationship responded to a modified form of the Conflict Tactics Scale. Three subscales were used: reasoning, verbal aggression, and violence. The results demonstrated that level of emotional commitment was a major factor which influenced conflict tactics. While the relationship between gender and level of emotional commitment was complex, the general pattern was that the greater the level of emotional commitment, the greater the reasoning, verbal aggression, and violence scores. Clear gender specific patterns in the use of conflict tactics across the eight levels of commitment emerged. (Author/NB)