In this article, I develop a new conceptual framework, a new thinking technology, for understanding the bullying that takes place between children in schools. In addition, I propose a new definition of bullying. This new thinking technology reflects a shift in focus from individual characteristics to the social processes that may lead to bullying. The social approach theorises bullying as one of many reactions to particular kinds of social insecurity. The concepts I develop include "the necessity of belonging", "social exclusion anxiety" and "the production of contempt and dignity by both children and adults". I also draw on Judith Butler's concept of abjection. In the last part of the article, I employ Karen Barad's theory of agential realism, focusing specifically on her concept of "intra-acting enacting forces". The entry to the theoretical development is based on empirical data generated in Denmark during a comprehensive five-year study of bullying. (Contains 7 notes.)