A significant image of classroom lectures is the one presented in J. K. Rowling's "Harry Potter" series. At Harry's Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, the most torturous class is easily History of Magic, which is, incidentally, the only class in the school taught by a ghost. Being taught by a ghost could be quite exciting: not so in History of Magic. The professor lectures, inducing in his students a coma-like state and alienating them entirely from what could be not only interesting but also intensely relevant subject matter. In this article, the author takes a look at some of the symptoms of disease seen in lecturing and discusses ways on how to resurrect the lost art of lecturing. (Contains 5 notes.)